Saturday, August 07, 2004

Got questions for the Pirate Guys? Fire away, me hearties, and the Wenches will prod 'em till they answer!

Do the pirate guys have all their arms and legs?

Curious in California
Well, I have to admit that I have all my limbs, and I feel a little embarassed to admit it. I mean, what kind of a pirate doesn't have a hook or a peg to call his own? With Cap'n Slappy, you just never know what to believe. But it does remind me of the riddle: What has eight arms and eight legs and eight eyes? The answer: Eight pirates.
Do pirates eat blubber?

Or do they just like to say "blubber?"
Ahoy Dean!

I, for one, LOVE to say blubber. Blubber. Blubber. Blubber. Blubber. Blubber.

When a pirate is ailing, Sawbones Burgess, the ship's surgeon aboard the Festering Boil, will often prescribe a large helping of whale blubber and cod liver oil. That'll get a pirate back on his feet in no time, usually in self-defense. Cap'n Slappy prefers weasel grease.

But these modern days, the most common use of blubber is to lubricate movie theater popcorn. That "buttery topping" is nothing more than rendered blubber - possibly from the nearest liposuction clinic. Of course I can't prove that, but it's my theory.

Ol' Chumbucket
Do these pants make me look fat?
Arrrrr, I see that the guys haven't responded t' this one. Smart lads, those two - they know that there be NO correct answer to this question.
What might it take to get a review copy of yer book?

Me blog's got lots o' readers.

By the way, do pirates like to say "blog?"
Susan asks, "Do these pants make me look fat?" Susan must think Ol' Chumbucket is stupid if she thinks he's going to answer that one. Now, there is a classic, smartass reply that I would NEVER give in a million years. But no fella with the IQ of brocolli (not one of yer smarter vegetables, although a good source of nutrition) is gonna answer that question. So you'll have to ask Cap'n Slappy.
Hard to say whether all or most pirates like to say blog. I don't , particularly. I understand where the word comes from and all, but it's kind of ugly sounding, if you ask me. I prefer to refer to this as the "ship's log" of the Festering Boil.

Now blubber! That's a word I enjoy saying! It just rolls off the tongue, much like the blubber on movie theater popcorn!
Do you reckon the Pirates will ever set foot in St. Augustine, FL? If so, d'ya reckon they'd stay at the Pirate Haus (
My name is Tegan Irish and im from Wisconsin ( im living in iowa now, city girl..ick) I digress, i saw you guys on wife swap, and i have to agree with you on the other family.. just cut-out barbie doll everything must be anally clean *shudder* felt bad for the kids, but they had to hear the truth that the clean was ruling them. I think pirattitude is cool, before I even knew what it was I was scoping out every where for something ith the jolly roger on it hee hee i like skulls ^_^ however I suppose I'm like my dad (RIP 1995) even though he was a really strict mean bilge rat he had his cool points, I used to think HE was a pirate becuase he wore and eye patch, sorry I'm leaving a much longer post than i hoped to...suffice to say its awesome to see people who dont conform to societies boring soul numbing rules, a hole family at that. keep flying your jolly roger high!
-Tegan (aka Spook)
E-mail me at
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